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Post by mrkelley on Nov 3, 2012 11:47:53 GMT -5
My voice is a bit scratchy from having a cold. And the chords aren't 100% there yet but here's a demo of the tune: picosong.com/333s/ My fear is that it sounds too derivative of "Almost Blue" by Elvis Costello. I also posted this on the Harmony Central site.
On the Other Side of Blue
(3:48)
Just like clockwork when it rains, I can’t help but think of you. You’re the bell, I’m Pavlov’s dog. I might as well be in a fog I can’t get through the other side of blue. And I still feel the phantom pains. They started when your arms withdrew. With lips unwanted and unkissed I’m still haunted by the distant misty view on the other side of blue. I have walked through darkened bedroom doors, to waiting arms that beckoned just like yours. They took me out to movies I didn’t want to see— hung up on the old ones you used to watch with me. Now I watch the passing trains pretending yours is overdue. The future’s black. There’s no reprieve. You won’t be back. Why still believe that dreams come true on the other side of blue? Words & Music © 2012 by Lee Charles Kelley
West Sixty Ninth Street Music (ASCAP)
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Post by oswlek on Nov 3, 2012 12:42:30 GMT -5
I'm only getting two seconds of the opening chord.
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Post by oswlek on Nov 3, 2012 12:51:26 GMT -5
Something is wrong with picosong. I can't play or download this song and cant play the one I posted in Bee's thread either.
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Post by oswlek on Nov 3, 2012 15:05:23 GMT -5
Cursory listen... lovely.
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Post by leeknight on Nov 3, 2012 16:36:21 GMT -5
It's getting to where I don't know where to post. Here's my post from "over there".
______________
It's completely different from Almost Blue. I can see why you might have concerns, both minor, descending basslines and the melodies both work off the 5th of the scale. But the feel is completely fresh. In superficial ways they are similar but you are by no means stepping on his tune.
And I love your tune. Just a couple of spots feel mechanically clunky. The quick back and forth from her bell to your dog, it has a bit of the Gershwin "You're the top" feel to it but lacks the break between the phrases so to my ear feels a tad rushed and a bit studied. It doesn't sing as well as it reads. I'd simplify.
You’re the bell, I’m Pavlov’s dog
And just like Pavlov's dog
And here too...
And I still feel the phantom pains
I can feel the phantom pains
Those two phrases feel like they need consonant "handles" on them. justlike or canfeelthe.
I love your straight ahead minor feel on this one. Very effective.
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Post by rsadasiv on Nov 3, 2012 22:54:04 GMT -5
I posted over there. I'm getting much more My Funny Valentine than Almost Blue. And I'm sure shortchord could sort it out in an hour or so, but some of those chords just don't feel right. Nothing seriously out, but I think it could flow better harmonically (and be more fun to play over after we finish playing under the vocalist  ) |
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Post by bee3 on Nov 4, 2012 6:08:36 GMT -5
It's getting to where I don't know where to post. This is what I was hoping to avoid... a division. If its fixed over there, we should move back. Maybe we keep All Other Business open... But reserve Songwriting threads for over there. But... Big question is... IS IT FIXED? |
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Post by unclenny on Nov 4, 2012 6:48:32 GMT -5
I think we should do the songwriting thing over there where there are folks who can use the influence this core of die-hard writers.
We should keep this alive, though. I like the idea of hanging in the Other Business forum. Ifr things get bad abain.....
Thank you so much Bee, for doing this for us in our time of need.
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Post by oswlek on Nov 4, 2012 8:13:45 GMT -5
I think we should do the songwriting thing over there where there are folks who can use the influence this core of die-hard writers. We should keep this alive, though. I like the idea of hanging in the Other Business forum. Ifr things get bad abain..... Thank you so much Bee, for doing this for us in our time of need. I agree. I really like having a place to ask you guys mixing questions without feeling guilty about it. The designated places on HC aren't active or inviting enough and I prefer dealing with those I'm comfortable with. |
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Post by rsadasiv on Nov 4, 2012 23:48:39 GMT -5
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Post by mrkelley on Nov 5, 2012 23:18:07 GMT -5
HC is acting funky again. I know. I posted this over there, and then went back to see it again, and it crashed. Here's what I've got now in terms of chords. (Thanks to Ram's ideas...) These chords are slightly different from the ones I posted earlier at HC. Note: I also changed the opening lines. Verses. A— ... A—Maj7/G# ....... A—7/G ... A—/F# I'm addicted to these chains. D— ................... D—7/C ........... B—7(b9) .... E7 They're all that's left of me and you. F6 .................................. G7(b9) You're the bell, I'm Pavlov's dog. CMaj9 ...................... A—Maj7 I might as well be in a fog. ................. B—7(b5) ..... E7 I can't get through ............................ A— ..... A—Maj7/G# ..... A—7/G ..... A—7/F# to the other side of blue. Bridge. D—7 ...... G7 ................ CMaj7 ............... A(b9) I have walked through darkened bedroom doors, F6 .......... G7(b9) ............... C ............... A7(b9) to waiting arms that beckoned just like yours. ......F—Maj7 .......... G13(b9) .. CMaj9 ..... A—Maj7 They took me out to movies I didn’t want to see— ........D— ........ D—7/C ......... B—7(b5) ............... E7 hung up on the old ones you used to watch with me. |
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Post by oldgitplayer on Nov 5, 2012 23:30:44 GMT -5
^^^
I'd like to understand your use of chords and I need to check what your minus symbol indicates.. I'm presuming that F-Maj7th is FdimMaj7, or have I got that wrong?
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Post by rsadasiv on Nov 5, 2012 23:54:43 GMT -5
The dash means minor. Maj7 means the seventh of the major scale (1 semitone below the tonic). Diminished has a flat 5 as well.
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Post by oldgitplayer on Nov 6, 2012 0:52:53 GMT -5
^^^
Thanks - that all makes sense now.
I use most of these chord movements myself, especially the opening line descending. I just have different names for them.
For example using a descending root of A G# G F# :
Am / Eaug / Am7 / D7 sus4
I don't speaka da lingo, but I knowa da sounds.
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Post by rsadasiv on Nov 6, 2012 1:04:04 GMT -5
You can also use / to write some of these chords. Am/G means an A minor chord with a G bass. The descending chromatic bass under a minor chord is very common, from My Funny Valentine in jazz to Stairway to Heaven in rock.
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Post by oldgitplayer on Nov 6, 2012 2:22:55 GMT -5
You can also use / to write some of these chords. Am/G means an A minor chord with a G bass. The descending chromatic bass under a minor chord is very common, from My Funny Valentine in jazz to Stairway to Heaven in rock. Yep - I understand this. In 1966, the rock band I was in split, and I took to a solo acoustic life playing coffee bars and folk clubs. Bert Jansch had released his 1st album the previous year, and everybody was wowed by Davie Graham's 'Angie' with its descending bass of A G F E motif over an Am chord. I knew no music theory then, and know very little today, because I was fortunate to be able to play by ear anything I heard. Most people seemed to play this way. It was rare to meet a guitarist who had any music lessons behind them. Nowadays, I am studying some theory, in an attempt to understand what I've done all these years, with the objective of crafting melody. I'm entirely a chord, bass and rhythm and harmony based musician, without much clue about melody. I hope this might change. |
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Post by rsadasiv on Nov 6, 2012 11:05:24 GMT -5
HC is acting funky again. I know. I posted this over there, and then went back to see it again, and it crashed. Here's what I've got now in terms of chords. (Thanks to Ram's ideas...) These chords are slightly different from the ones I posted earlier at HC. Note: I also changed the opening lines. Verses. A— ... A—Maj7/G# ....... A—7/G ... A—/F# I'm addicted to these chains. D— ................... D—7/C ........... B—7(b9) .... E7 They're all that's left of me and you. F6 .................................. G7(b9) You're the bell, I'm Pavlov's dog. CMaj9 ...................... A—Maj7 I might as well be in a fog. ................. B—7(b5) ..... E7 I can't get through ............................ A— ..... A—Maj7/G# ..... A—7/G ..... A—7/F# to the other side of blue. Bridge. D—7 ...... G7 ................ CMaj7 ............... A(b9) I have walked through darkened bedroom doors, F6 .......... G7(b9) ............... C ............... A7(b9) to waiting arms that beckoned just like yours. ......F—Maj7 .......... G13(b9) .. CMaj9 ..... A—Maj7 They took me out to movies I didn’t want to see— ........D— ........ D—7/C ......... B—7(b5) ............... E7 hung up on the old ones you used to watch with me. Looks good - I'm not so skilled at sight singing - will need to hear it played to really understand - I'll try and get to it on the guitar tonight. |
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Post by rsadasiv on Nov 7, 2012 21:49:15 GMT -5
Works ok for me.
Figuring out how I feel about those b9 extensions. I definitely like the A7b9 at the end of the bridge.
I haven't been able to find a fingering that make the
CMaj9 ...................... A—Maj7
sound good.
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Post by rsadasiv on Nov 7, 2012 22:08:46 GMT -5
Although when I like that A7b9 I'm actually playing it as an Edim7 (no A)
(low to high)
X
X
2
3
2
3
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Post by rsadasiv on Nov 7, 2012 22:14:02 GMT -5
In place of Cmaj9, A-maj7 I'm liking Cmaj7,Edim7
leading into the D- of the bridge (3rd line)
Meh, either way is fine.
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Post by mrkelley on Nov 7, 2012 23:19:42 GMT -5
Works ok for me. Figuring out how I feel about those b9 extensions. I definitely like the A7b9 at the end of the bridge. I haven't been able to find a fingering that make the CMaj9 ...................... A—Maj7 sound good. I play the CMaj9 without the B. So it's really a C9 w/o the 7th or the Maj7th. It's not optimal but it works for me. (I guess it's more like a Csus9.) X 3 2 0 3 0 The A—Maj7 is fingered like so: X 0 2 1 1 0 That one sounds pretty good to me. |
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Post by mrkelley on Nov 7, 2012 23:21:40 GMT -5
Although when I like that A7b9 I'm actually playing it as an Edim7 (no A) (low to high) X X 2 3 2 3 Try this: X 0 2 3 2 3 That gives you an A on the bottom. |
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Post by mrkelley on Nov 7, 2012 23:25:43 GMT -5
I'm playing around with several different ways of doing the turnarounds and the movement into the bridge.
It was this:
A— ..... A—Maj7/G# ..... A—7/G ..... A—7/F#
to the other side of blue.
Now I'm thinking for the verses I'll do this:
A— ..... A—Maj7/G# ..... B—7(b5) ..... E7
to the other side of blue.
And into the bridge, maybe:
A— ..... F ..... A— ..... A-7(sus4)
to the other side of blue.
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Post by shortchord on Nov 8, 2012 16:41:14 GMT -5
Works ok for me. Figuring out how I feel about those b9 extensions. I definitely like the A7b9 at the end of the bridge. I haven't been able to find a fingering that make the CMaj9 ...................... A—Maj7 sound good. I play the CMaj9 without the B. So it's really a C9 w/o the 7th or the Maj7th. It's not optimal but it works for me. (I guess it's more like a Csus9.) X 3 2 0 3 0 I would call Cadd9. The "sus" implies that there is no third in the chord. |
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